Healthy aging is clearly different for Rejeanne Fairhead, the wonderful 96-year-old lady from Ottawa who set a world record for a 5k marathon. Fairhead is quoted as saying that she is glad that she inspired people with her effort — she said her motto is to not let your age define what you can do.
Senior is a word that doesn't always sit comfortably with me. Too often, senior is just a word that boxes older people in and labels them by chronological age. We assume that everybody over some imaginary default age is the same and they have the same needs, the same aspirations and the same functional abilities to do the things they have reason to value.
I have come to realize that I talk a lot of garbage to myself. My internal dialogue has often been negative and defeatist because of assumptions that I make about myself based on my age. I often crack these jokes out loud about getting old. One wise friend has long cautioned me for such negative self-talk, and I am beginning to understand the point.
How can we expect age discrimination to genuinely dissipate in our society if we are walking around telling ourselves “I am too old for that”? Eventually, one reflects, how can I be mad at people or institutions for holding the same kind of stereotypes that I throw at myself every day?
Chronological age doesn’t determine your aspirations and it certainly doesn’t determine your capacity to be able to do things. It’s part of an artificial life structure that expects us to study until 25, then work until we reach the magical default retirement age of 65. We box people into that last group even though it may not fit for them.
Mass marketing and media often position older people as vulnerable through depictions of things like wrinkly skin and the need for quick access to life insurance. They may seem like small things, and they might seem trivial, but they reinforce the stereotypes that we begin to internalize at a very early age. I expect this will only get worse.
Healthy aging will be different for everybody. Our first step should be to give people options when it comes to activities, homes and medical care. Many will want to continue to be part of the workforce. I don’t think there’s a simple answer, but I think the first step is to break away from this rigid framing of the life trajectory. When this happens, senior will invent lives that you can’t even imagine.
Seniors are an incredible physical and social resource. They can bring all sorts of creativity and positive benefits if we enable them to create these new lives. In combating ageism, we have to find diversity-inclusive ways of moving forward that are fair and allow for the incredible heterogeneity of our seniors.
In closing, I want to honour Seniors Month and the staff of our Town who work so hard to enrich and support our lives by recounting a story that was passed on to me by a resident.
Apparently, a senior who uses a mobility device was trying to access his home but could not get himself and his machine over the gutter on the roadway. The final paved surface had not yet been applied and there was a “ledge” of two or three inches that could not be mounted by his machine.
Here’s where the story reminds us of the goodness of people and how we can really help each other. A Town of Pelham Public Works crew were working in the area patching potholes. They saw the man’s predicament and they lifted the mobility device onto the sidewalk with its occupant. And this where it gets really good, they created a small cold patch ramp so that the senior would always have access until the final paving is complete.
Nothing further needs to be said but...thank you.
